The Pure Waters of Tasmania

My favourite ad on TV last year was for Boag’s Draught.

It’s a clever one that plays on experiencing the “pure waters of Tasmania”

An old bloke tells the story while picking out notes on his guitar – “The pure waters of Tasmania make everything a little bit better….”

In the first scene, a guy riding through a stream on his bicycle leaves the water riding a motorbike.

Then somebody launches their canoe off a wharf with a splash…. Rising to the surface is (not) the canoe, but a half-cabin cruiser.

A bloke cleaning fish drops his pocket knife into a stream. Reaching in to retrieve it, he pulls out Luke Skywalker’s light saber.

Crowds of people bring down crates of empty bottles to submerge them, and lift them out as fresh trays of Boag’s draught.

The old bloke telling the story describes how his father never wore the same pair of shoes twice.

Another guy pushes his girlfriend into the water!

Watch the ad right now before reading the rest of this story. Just click in the video.

After seeing the ad a few times, I was starting to feel inspired…

Imagine if you drove your old fourby into the water……..what new-look 4x4 would you drive out in?

An old bush-basher might get a new engine, or suspension or lockers!

When I talked to the guys at the office about it, John and Ray said. “Why don’t you take down a brand new 200 series Landcruiser” ….”Imagine what you would have when you drove it out of the water!...”

So that’s exactly what I did. I borrowed John Agostino’s (Tough Dog) Landcruiser, promising to bring it back in better condition that when I first received it.

I made arrangements to get it onto the Spirit of Tasmania, taking me from Port Melbourne across Bass Strait, arriving in Devonport.

After getting off the ferry, I drove west, heading to Dove Lake, a World Heritage area, and home of the spectacular Cradle Mountain. “It can’t get any better than that!” I thought..

The Tough Dog 200 series ‘cruiser got me there in no time. Enough though to anticipate what would be. The Tough Dog flagship vehicle was already a great machine. How to do improve on one of the best?

When I got to Dove Lake, no-one was to be seen. It was quiet and the water surface still.

I engaged low-range 4WD. My plan was to take the ‘cruiser into the water just above the axle line and see what happened. I was a long way from home, and with no-one around for miles I erred on the side of caution.

Entering the water seemed fine. All tyres kept traction, until suddenly the ‘cruiser 'dropped' free-fall style, placing the water-line half-way up the window glass, and beginning to stream into the cabin.

Panic-stricken, I floored the accelerator in an attempt to get out. The Toyota’s V8 howled and the tyres churned enough to make their own wake, destroying the remaining window vision I had left.

Not good.

Then, without understanding what or how it had happened, the Landcruiser (with me still inside it) was back on the shore of the Lake. The interior was completely soaked and a mess.

A CB radio microphone was draped across the dash as well as an old bushman’s hat.

The vehicle’s soaked interior now looked ‘old’. At the rear passenger foot wells, beer bottles ‘clinked’ together as they floated around like dead fish in a couple inches of water.

Funny thing was, I didn’t remember bringing any of that stuff with me.

I opened the door to step out. The door was stiff to push and the hinges creaked.

Turning around to look at the Lancruiser, intent on assessing the damage and thinking about how I would go about explaining it to John back at Tough Dog headquarters…. I stopped still and just stared – stunned.

I was now the driver of John Rooth’s HJ45 series Troopy (aka ‘Milo’). 4WD Action magazine’s celebrity journo’s vehicle. The old troop carrier was a star attraction in itself!

Sitting on a nearby log, I took some time to take in everything that had happened.

The ‘pure waters of Tasmania’ were meant to make everything a little bit better!

A guy drops his pocket knife in and pulls out a Light Saber. I drive in with a new 200-series Landcruiser and drive out with Roothy’s troopy!

Then it occurred to me. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad deal after all. Old Milo has conquered just about every rugged inch of Australia without a hitch. She’s had more exterior work than the audience at the Hollywood Globes, plus high-ground clearance, a solid-axle front-end, and just about every conceivable touring and bush-driving equipment that you could want.

The old Toyota is not flash, but for the serious off-roader, what more could you ask for?

When I got Milo back to Tough Dog headquarters, Agostino and me didn’t really see eye-to-eye.

I had taken his flagship vehicle, with its mirror-image black paintwork and paw-print graphics, and brought back a shed-painted troopy more than 30 years its senior.

I tried to explain to John, the same conclusions I had come to – and how it could be even better if he replaced the suspension with Tough Dog springs and shocks….. but to no avail.

A few weeks later, I checked on him to see how it was all going. At last he’s seen the light, and old Milo’s never ridden better.